Something That We Do

Love is something that we do!

12.03.2010

Wonder

Recently, I have begun cultivating wonder in my life.  I've been welcoming it, embracing it, and becoming good friend with it.  You see, up until two months ago, I honestly thought I would live in Gainesville for years and years to come.  When Carl was offered a job in California, I was really hesitant to go along with it, and I downright refused.  I dug my heels in and said "Nope, we're staying here.  We have plans here."
But then, I realized that my life was not only my life, it was my husband's life.  This was something that he wanted really badly, and to see him happy I would do nearly anything.  So, I let go and said "Okay, looks like we're moving to California."  There are days that I still don't think I've actually realized where I'm going, but the whole process of finding a new place to live, planning our journey across the country and looking into a new life out there has caused my brain to go every which way.
People frequently ask me what type of job I will get.  I have no clue.  I'd like to work in the school system, and I'd like to work with hard of hearing children, but I don't know if that's where I'll end up.  I'm a planner, so for me to have the ability to let go of all certainties is a big change for me.  However, there are a few certainties that I will never let go of, and these are what help me stay grounded while also cultivating wonder:
My husband and I will be married till death due us part.  It's our choice, and we're sticking to it.  That's why we made a commitment.
I have the unconditional love of my family, and some of my friends.  I know they're there for me no matter what.
What more could a girl ask for?  I'm about to go set foot on the other side of the country and start a new life, but at the end of the day I know I can always come home to my husband and our family.  Although I am nervous about leaving my hometown, I know that no matter where I go, we will be okay.  I'm going to have fun trying to find a job, setting up a new home, and meeting new friends.  And all these things make me wonder in a way I never knew was possible.

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